faithlessdx

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bipolar swings by faithlessdx, literature

Bipolar Chemical Dance by songs-of-flight, literature

Literature

Bipolar Chemical Dance

Dance they dance for the Mystery and the fire twists around them flows inside them a mad passion burning so bright paint upon a canvas words spill out across a page feet spin in intricate circles blind eyes with otherworldly sight enraptured, intoxicated with echoes of the Light ................................................................................................................................... Chemical Dance phosphorescence inside the brain burning inside glows deadly to itself but brightly to others something to give something that kills the sufferer something that brings light moth to flame love of t

bipolar by maniasdoor, literature

Literature

bipolar

my emotions are like spilled paint, flooding the streets with an array of manic colors. the fumes rise into the air like the angel-sweet smoke from a stick of incense, and my peers are getting high off my mania laced with misery. [they'll never forget me after i'm gone, my epitaph depicting my fame]. i'm staring at the city skyline from the edge of a cliff, questioning my existence yet falling in love with the incandescent lights under the midnight sky, reflecting in my midnight eyes. i try to refrain from leaping off, slowly letting go of my education, my enemies, the memories that haunt my head like wailing pol

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Sep 1
Japan
Deviant for 12 years
He / Him

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on the move

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Flyleaf/Muse

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Portal 2

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faithlessdx

Jul 25, 2012

the Edge

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It is not a physical thing, but rather the boundary I have come to recognize, in my mind, my emotions. Its the line in the sand, the point of the hill where you can't climb back up from. And it isn't singular; there are several and each has it's own emotional and physical pains. The edge I most frequently cross is that of Spiraling; another word I give special connotations to. Years before I knew the terms for any bipolar issues I knew this. When things are decent, my thoughts flow in a line I can follow and not fear, from one topic to the next. And I don't notice that my pattern of thoughts is slipping before it begins. Frequently my inner

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faithlessdx

Jul 25, 2012

still using the facade

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I realized I'm relying on the facade I've been hoping to not need anymore. The entire day I was some strange mix of drop dead tired and hyper; just all over the place. Wasn't able to contact my bio-father this week. Torn between disappointment, and some degree of relief, as previous contacts have brought up active suicidal feelings. Spoke with my mom this morning, feeling guilty for not putting up the facade of not being depressed; I hate upsetting other people. They don't deserve it. Have realized that I'm not startled/ worried about the feelings of self hate/etc, sh, suicide; I think a healthier person would be. It's been interesting po

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fading-fields

Oct 27, 2011

greetings. you came across my old "maniasdoor" dA account from 3 years ago. the message you sent me was from exactly a month ago, according to the date. i was sixteen while using that account, and a very lost basketcase who was losing hope fast. i'm nearly 19, now, this is my new account. i lost the password to maniasdoor and ended up with three other accounts, and decided to stay on this one. i know what it's like to sink. i'm doing much better than whatever you saw on that account. and i'm feeling much better about life than i was then. thanks for the advice though.